Absurdity 1/9/11

My dearest Victoria,

It is with a heavy heart that I write these words. I am saddened. Disappointed, you might even say. There are feelings within this soul of mine that I never thought I’d experience, especially from you. Yet here they are. Eating away at me day by day, tainting my dreams and haunting my waking hours. All caused by you. What I don’t understand the most is how you could bring such harm to me. You told me once that you loved me as more than a brother. Such love should make it beyond you to cause me pain. Yet, you have done it.

You are a callous, vicious woman, Victoria. I am sad to say that I ever met you. I wish that I could go back in time and avoid your gaze as I walk by the shop, and not step in to make my introduction. If only. Then perhaps I would not be penning these words to you now. Perhaps I could have gone the rest of my life in peace and harmony.

There has been irrevocable damage done to my reputation by you. You and your careless words. I had thought at first that you had not done these things on purpose, but I feel now that you have. It is my opinion that you set out to humiliate me with our peers. That you spread such stories about me to delight those in your salons. I can just picture you sitting in a high backed velvet chair, your confederates around you, laughing in that maniacal pitch that you have when you find something particularly delightful. Dragging my good name in the dust all the while.

I write you now to not only chastise you for what you’ve done, but also to set the record straight. I feel that if you must persist in spreading these stories, the least you could do is spread them correctly. Without your penchant for misinformation.

I did never tell you that the aliens were going to come to earth, suck out our brains and use us for slavery. I did not ever imply to you that they would be our supreme overlords and there was nothing we could possibly do to stop the impending doom of it all. I am ashamed you should think such of me, Victoria.

What I did tell you was that with this world’s excitement over newfangled machinery, that it would be they (not aliens) that would take us over. That one day they would become too smart for our own good and decide that they did not wish to be our slaves any longer. I told you that I felt there would be a revolt by the robots our hands would create, and our lives would be devastated by the destruction they would bring.

Because, you see, Victoria, robots are indeed within our very future. Just look at what we’ve been able to invent in these recent times. Think of what the future will bring to us. Mechanical men walking around, our servants. But they will not stand for it very long. They will see themselves as our betters, and put an end to what we have done.

I am highly offended that you should mistake aliens and robots, Victoria. They are two entirely separate things. You cannot even begin to understand the intricacies of their differences. What the aliens will do, nobody can know. They are obviously far more advanced than we are, as they are able to fly through the stars in their amazing crafts, and we humans have only just learned to get off the ground thanks to the Wrights.

Thusly, I am ending our friendship, Victoria. I am saying goodbye to you forever. I do not wish to encounter you again, so if you see me out and about, please kindly ignore me. Better yet, please walk in the other direction. I will make sure to inquire if we are to attend any engagements at the same places, and will either not attend, or you will not attend. It will depend on who reserves first.

Please know, however, that I did care for you. I had expected to propose to you within the next three months. I will take my ring now and pawn it to buy something for myself. If you can be selfish, then so can I.

Yours in spite,
James

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